Guns don't kill people, fictional guns kill people. That was one takeaway from NRA President Wayne LaPierre's press conference on Friday in response to the massacre at Sandy Hook Elementary School. Here are LaPierre's words:
And here's another dirty little truth that the media try their best to conceal: There exists in this country a callous, corrupt and corrupting shadow industry that sells, and sows, violence against its own people. Through vicious, violent video games with names like Bulletstorm, Grand Theft Auto, Mortal Kombat and Splatterhouse. And here’s one: it’s called Kindergarten Killers. It’s been online for 10 years. How come my research department could find it and all of yours either couldn’t or didn’t want anyone to know you had found it?
Ah yes, Kindergarten Killer—the real culprit behind our nation's epidemic of gun violence. So insidious is this game that no one has ever heard of it, let alone played it. The NRA blames the media for that. Because when the media aren't busy corrupting our moral fiber by promoting violent entertainment, they're corrupting our moral fiber by not promoting violent entertainment.
Duly shamed by LaPierre for their previous ignorance (or willful suppression) of Kindergarten Killer's existence, some of us in the media are at last performing our civic obligation to publicize this game to a wider audience. And what a game it is.
You can tell from the start that this is a title built to lure kids in and not let them go until it has turned them into ice-blooded slayers, because the first thing you see when you load it in your browser is a message telling you it probably won't work very well even on the lowest-quality setting. Those who want the game to function properly are helpfully directed to a different website, which as far as I could tell no longer exists.